so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
