would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
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