Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
