I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Randomize
