Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
Everything about him screamed your future.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Randomize
