WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
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