This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Randomize
