Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
two words: eviction party
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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