So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Randomize
