honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
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