HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
she told me i tasted like america
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
Randomize
