im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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