well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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