I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
