I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
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