let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize
