Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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