So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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