Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize