do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
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