I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Randomize
