I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
