you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
