um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
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