No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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