the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
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