i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
You're completely useless in the revolution.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
