no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
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