yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize
