Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
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