You're completely useless in the revolution.
I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
Randomize
