He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize