so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize