carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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