I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
