Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
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