I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Randomize
