Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
