i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
Operation Purity has been aborted
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
