Your tits are I can't wait for
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
40s are totally the cure
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