i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
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