i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Randomize
