i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
Randomize
