oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Randomize
