We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Randomize
