I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
