We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Randomize
