i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Randomize
