How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
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