i either got mauled last night by a velociraptor or an angry lipstick lesbian. could have been both
My Higher Power is John Stamos
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
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