you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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